This perfectly nice person announced that they were not vaccinated. I thought they were going to explain what circumstances had interfered but then they said they had no plans to get the jab. They added that they weren’t against it but just didn’t see a need – said they never get sick. Said they think it’s wrong to force people to prove they have been vaccinated before boarding a plane or a cruise ship. Their logic? There is a rapid test available.

The enormity of their confession left me floored. I said I was vaccinated and I gave my best reasons in favour of the vaccination. It was all very civilized, polite, very Canadian. My calm comments belied my anger.

Yes, I think anger might be the right word. Or dismay, or frustration. Mostly, I felt betrayed. Strange, isn’t it? Betrayed.

The gradual reopening of the province is positive. Seeing all the people happily getting the jab at the clinic did good things for me. Talking to folks who are proud to be double dosed made me feel the world was righting itself. Things might never be the same but things were unfolding as they should. It reinforced my positive attitude towards people – an attitude that has been severely tested by CNN and Facebook. The media, social and otherwise, have been trying hard to convince me that the world is terrifyingly evil, stupid and unpredictable. My mental health took quite the hit over the last year – and I know I am not alone.

Things seemed to be getting better. A little bit at a time, but better. Not rush out to crowded public events better – but getting there.

It seemed to me that almost everyone I knew was double vaxxed. Sure, I know a few on the fringe of conspiracy stupidity but I am not around them. Even some vaccine hesitaters were signing up for the shot. My mood was lifting.  

That civil conversation over a glass of wine made me realize, it is impossible to know. The inevitable uncertainty is distressing. It has always been true – but I need to find a way to accept this new layer.

I am okay with having to prove you have been vaccinated or prove you have a legitimate exemption. I don’t think we need the to wear the proof on our chest or wave it around at the family picnic. But I’m okay with the concept.

We all need to have our trust restored. I need to know – that while the world is a dangerous place and that bad things happen – I need to know that we, collectively, take reasonable precautions to protect ourselves – and each other.

I would never hop in a car with a friend and ask if they have a driver’s licence. I assume they do. I trust they do. I support the necessity of the licence but don’t think it needs to be shown to everyone.

But what if a friend said, “Hop in, I’ll drive – and by the way I think a driver’s licence is just a stupid tax grab?” A comment like that exposes huge differences between us – between our integration into society – between the way we process information. It changes my entire perception of that person.

I might appreciate their honesty and their willingness to own their opinion. But I wouldn’t get in the car with them. And I might trust them less.

This is an ethical problem. I do not want to play a part in more divisiveness – there is too much of that. I don’t want to impose my beliefs or opinions on anyone else. I have an unfortunate desire to be a peace keeper rather than a rabble rouser.

But it has to be said.

Some folks see themselves as brave individuals not lured into a herd mentality. I see someone sitting on their hands while the rest of us row against the storm.

Someone else’s decision to not get vaccinated affects me. It impacts on my perception of the cohesiveness of our society – of our collective safety – of our common sense of the greater good. Of who we are.

More than the possibility of the unvaccinated making me or a loved one sick (and that is still a concern) – but more than that is the sense of betrayal, the reduction of trust.

It is your choice.

Be smart, be kind – choose to get vaccinated.